Where To Go From Here?

I am at a really confusing point in my life. I don't know how I got here and I sure don't know how to get back. I used to be a fairly motivated person. Had dreams, plans, goals all that good stuff. I haven't even thought about any of those things since the age of 19, when I found out I was pregnant with Kole. I started school right before I found out I was pregnant and sure wasn't going to let this get in the way of me finishing. Women have babies all the time and complete their college education. Hours after Kole was born, I knew this was going to stand in the way of A LOT of things. I was okay with this. My only responsibility was to be the best mom I could be to this precious new life, who needed me every minute of every day. For 5 years I pushed through these low points, pushed past the need to find myself, heck I could barely take care of myself at times. It's always been, and still is, about taking care of my family and our home. This may sound dreamy, not having to go to work and being able to spend all of my time with the people I love the most. In reality, I AM EXHAUSTED! More mentally than physically. I don't think you ever really realize how much goes into caring for 2 children, 1 with special needs and a home,( Not to mention the love of my life and our pets, and all the other normal everyday struggles) till you do it every single day!!! There isn't a day that goes by that I feel accomplished, that I completed everything that needed to be done. It is never ending!! Because of these feelings, I feel guilty about staying home, like i'm not taking care of everything anyway so why stay home? On top of that, I feel very unappreciated. I feel I am EXPECTED to do all of the things that I do because I don't have a job. Like this is my punishment for not being a contributing member of society. So because I feel like no one is going to appreciate what I do anyway, why do it? Only stay at home moms truly appreciate all the effort and energy that goes into it, I feel like other people look at us as "lucky". We might not have to leave our house and go to our job, and we might not get paid to do what we do, but believe me WE BUST OUR ASS! Another thing, people who work get to clock out, be done for the day. I am always on the clock and am never guaranteed a break. All of these feelings have caught up with me and I am now ready to find out who I am and what I want in life. I don't know how to do this? I don't know where to start? For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a nurse. That was always the plan, go back to school and become and LPN. As of today, I don't feel like that is what I want to do anymore. May sound selfish, but I am downright tired of caring for other people. Maybe later in life, after i've taken some time for me, I will have this dream again, who knows? How do I begin to figure out what will make me happy? And how do I balance making myself happy and doing what is right for my family? I have no one to rely on as far as taking care of my kids for me. So I have no time to pursue whatever my dream may be. It is all a bit overwhelming right now. I know this will take a whole lot of time, I just hope I don't begin to lose myself even further during this time. Please do not take this as me complaining about taking care of my family or not being happy, I am just feeling a little lost in this big ol world.